A Farce/Transcript

Transcript

 * Brother Blood is nearby, Titans. If we don't stop him, our beloved city will be destroyed. Fan out, and find him!
 * He's not in here!
 * He's not in here either!
 * All clear!
 * We have to find him before he destroys the city!
 * Before I destroy the city?
 * Brother Blood!
 * Look upon the damage you have brought, Titans!
 * Well, sometimes you have to do what's wrong to do what's right.
 * This is millions of dollars in property damage.
 * Enough of the talk!
 * Don't you see, Titans? You are the real menace to Jump City, and that's why I lured you here.
 * Ugh? What's lured mean?
 * It's a fancy way of saying this is a trap!
 * A trap? Nice one, I did not see that coming! Up high, BB!
 * OK, up high. Way to go, dude. Now, it's time for the Teen Titans to answer for their crimes.
 * Where...what...What is this?
 * This, is the trial of the Titans!
 * Yes, Titans.
 * Are you done?
 * Teen Titans. You stand accused of the careless destruction of Jump City. If you are found guilty, you will be sentenced...to death!
 * Death?!
 * Aw, that's the worst!
 * I can handle that.
 * The persecution can proceed, with it's opening statement.
 * Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. I intend to prove that the Teen Titans are not the protectors of Jump City as they claim! In their pursuit of justice, they destroy everything in their path with careless disregard for the safety of the city. They, not we, are the true villains!
 * [Starfire cries] He is the right. We are the monsters! [Starfire continues to cry]
 * We make me sick!
 * Guilty, so guilty.
 * Lock us up!
 * ,, , and : Lock us up! Lock us up!
 * Quiet! What is wrong with you?!
 * He made a compelling argument, yo.
 * You call that compelling? Then prepare to have your opinions swayed by a, master orator! [Clears throat] Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. You are being asked to judge us today, and I suppose we're all easy to judge. Take me for example. I'm short. I can be obsessive at times. My pants are too tight. Sure, my breath is repulsive and I always smell like I just got back from the gym, so moist. And yes, I have some back hair, but it's not too much.
 * I nervously bite my toenails and they get stuck in my teeth. I'm so pale, you can see my veins. Look! Look at my veins! Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, look at my veins! I don't know what it's like to love, or to be loved. That's why I go to bed at night, wondering if I'm going to die alone, and of course, I will. Anyway...where was I going with this? Oh, right, you can't handle the truth! Thank you.
 * I think I won them over.
 * The persecution may call the first witness.