More of the Same/Transcript

Below if a full transcript for the episode "More of the Same".

Transcript
[EPISODE BEGINS] [SINGING OPERA MUSIC] Titans! We've been waiting for this all year. Tonight, is New Year's Eve! [HONKING] [ALL CHEERING] I can't wait to get my midnight smoochie-smoochie on! [BEAST BOY GROANS] And I may finally release the Christmas tree back into the wild! Be free! Be free! I just wanna see that ball drop! Oh, yeah! Tonight we're gonna party like - tonight! - Yes. Party! Whoo-hoo! What a great time! Until you ruin it again like you did last year! My bad, bro! I shouldn't have invited that pack of wild dogs. I know. [BARKING] [SCREAMING] Fortunately, New Year's Eve is a time to wipe the slate clean and start fresh. But only if we observe the New Year's Eve traditions properly. We blew it last year and look what happened! - Our year was garbage! - [SHIVERS] The February! And we didn't keep any of our New Year's resolutions! What are you talking about? I kept my resolution. Tight as a drum! [THUDS] [CREAKING] I like sandwiches. And ice cream. Don't judge me! Tonight, we will have the perfect celebration to ensure a happy new year. But to do it, we're going to have to train.

Raven, explain.

The perfect New Year's Eve celebration involves four traditions we must master. The toast, the countdown, the midnight kiss and the singing of that weird song no one knows the words to. Yo, I gots toasts for days! - What's next? - Not that kind of toast! A toast is when you say a few profound words about your friends and the future. Cyborg, toast me. Oh, uh I'd like to say words! You are people! - Cheers! - Unacceptable! - Starfire. Toast me.

As we say on Tamaran [SPEAKING IN TAMARANIAN] Harmonious. But not profound enough! Raven. Toast me.

So, uh, next year we might die! - Too dark! Beast Boy. Toast me. Um may your horse not pee-pee on your shoe and the devil not look at you in the coming year. What does that even mean? - Ow! - Moving on! Let's try the countdown. [SCOFFS] Who can't count backwards? What? There's something called counting backwards? You know, Beastie, you start at 10 and you go to 1. No, I don't know! I don't know at all! - I can barely count forwards! - Our year is depending on it, Beast Boy.

Now focus! - Ahhh! Uh, okay, I got this. Ten! [COUNTS QUICKLY] Nine! [COUNTS QUICKLY] Eight! [COUNTS QUICKLY] Seven! This isn't so hard. It took you 10 seconds to get through four seconds! - Moving on! - Ahhh! - Next up, perfecting the midnight kiss.

Uh, what are the pens for? To draw the perfect match on your hand for kissing practice, obviously. Now go ahead. Don't be shy! [CHUCKLES] I love a girl with a sense of humor. [GIGGLES] Mmm-mmm. Looking good, marker mama! [IN SPANISH ACCENT] And you're one hot hombre. [SIGHS] The dreamy. Ooh, nice mustache, you little hipster! [PURRS] [STRAINING] No, no, eyelashes are wrong, erase, erase! Redraw! - Yes, yes, beautiful! - You almost done, bro? I'm ready to get my smooch on! Quiet! She needs to be perfect! And, there! [IN FEMININE VOICE] Oh, Robin! I do not know if I can wait until the midnight! [CHUCKLES] Of course you can't. But you must! Now, these kisses should be tender and respectful, but with enough passion to kindle the flames of a long life together. Titans, kiss! I've waited a long time for this moment. [FEMININE VOICE] Oh, Robin! What is that foul odor? [NORMAL VOICE] What? Oh, no, no! I had fish and onions for dinner! [FEMININE VOICE] I am sorry, but I cannot kiss the onion-fish mouth! [NORMAL VOICE] Why? What was I thinking? Why am I always sabotaging myself? [GRUNTING] [CRYING] I'll, uh [CLEARS THROAT] work on it. Moving on! The singing of that weird song no one knows the words to. Okay, Titans. Sing. [SINGING "AULD LANG SYNE" TIMIDLY] That's not how the song goes! No one knows the words, dude! Well, I do. Now, sit back and listen to these bittersweet lyrics. [CLEARS THROAT] [SINGS TUNING NOTES] [SINGING "AULD LANG SYNE"] Wow. I like our version better. I think we're ready. Let's take a practice run. Cyborg, toast! [CLEARS THROAT] As I look around this room, I see a shared past, a wonderful present and a bright future. We are more than friends, we are family. To the Teen Titians. May our bonds grow stronger as we grow older. Long winded, but sweet. Beast Boy! Countdown. [COUNTING] Ah! I'm moonwalking with numbers! Yo! Starfire. The midnight kiss. [KISSING] [WHISPERING] I wish I was your hand. Raven. Song. [SINGING "AULD LANG SYNE"] Great! I think those are the lyrics. Titans! To the countdown! [MUZAK PLAYING] Yo, I can't wait for this terrible year to be over so I can get a good one going. I am actually looking forward to the February. For the first time, our future is looking bright! It's almost midnight, Titans! Let's ring in the new year! I got this! Uh, ten - Ten - Not yet, Beast Boy! My toast! I have to say words! Cyborg! Beast Boy! Keep it together! Uh, nine Numbers, numbers! More numbers! [TRUMPETS] Am I to be the kissing now? What? Wait, no! No! - Save it for me! - Oh, my toast! My buttery toast! Mwah. The kiss! The kiss! [SINGING "DANNY BOY"] Wrong song, Raven, wrong song! [KISSES] [MUSIC] Okay, we had another bad year, but tonight is New Year's Eve! And we can turn it all around! Next year will only get better! - Are you ready? - [ALL] Oh, yeah! - Whoo-hoo! - ROBIN: No, no! What are you doing? [ALL CLAMORING] [MUSIC] I have a good feeling about this year, Titans. Give it up, Robin. We'll never break this cycle of misery.

[GROANS] My shoes hurt.

Then maybe it's time to take things into our liver-spotted hands and pay a visit to those responsible for this endless cycle of misery. There they are. The masters of time. Why have you entered our domain, Titans? We want a good year for once. We are bummed out! Never! Watching you repeat the same mistakes year after year is too much fun. Good stuff. Very funny. [CHUCKLES] Then you leave us no choice. Titans, go! [SNORING] What are you waiting for? Come on, fight the baby! I'm not gonna fight a baby! Then fight the old man! Just pick one! Baby! Go play! [COOING] [GROANING] [GROANS] [GROANS] Oy vey! Respect your elders. [CRYING] [BEAST BOY GROANS] You won't find me so easy to defeat, Titans. Oh! [GROANS] Hey! I need that to stand.

You can have it back - If you promise to give us a good year. Mmm. Very well. Enjoy your year, Titans. Yes! We did it! [BEEPS] [HONKS] Happy new year! [SINGING "AULD LANG SYNE"] [RAVEN SINGING "DANNY BOY"]

[EPISODE ENDS]